Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
You make my pants go to Red Alert.
Hey, it's about time you docked that shuttle!
Your ugliness is so intense, it's like a punch in the face to anyone unfortunate enough to gaze upon you.
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.
Klingon: Daqtagh HInob! tIqwIj qa'angnIS! (Hand me a d'k tahg! I must show you my heart!)
You not only have a pretty face, I bet you're beautiful on the inside too!
Anomalous heat reading off the starboard bow, setting an intercept course!
Wanna ride on my kangaroo?
Klingon: pu'jIn vIpoQ. mInDu'lIj vIbejtaHvIS DaqwIj vIlIj! (I need a map. I got lost while I was watching your eyes!)
I've never seen such a huge bulge in a man's pants... wait a minute, yes I have - mine!
Wanna listen to me drone on about art, bicycles, and sustainable-source fair-trade coffee?
Wanna come back to my place and see what the inside of my trunk looks like?
Let me show you why Australia started out as a penal colony...
What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing! Wing!
I ordered whole wheat toast but it tasted funny. I think something was awry.
Let's go somewhere and postulate you out of that dress.
Hey gurl, you lookin' a little stressed out. Why don't you let me check yo' thetan levels back at MY place?
Have you ever bought a vibrator? (No.) Do you want to rent one?
Your pants are the final frontier
Klingon: may'luchwIjmo' Qobbe' tajmey 'ach tIqwIj luDuQ mInDu'lIj! (My armor shields me from knives, but your eyes pierce my heart!)
