Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
I'm a poodle in the streets but a bulldog in the sheets
Do you believe in helping the homeless? Take me home with you.
Hey girl, where you fin all my life?
I just met you, and this is crazy but here's my bib number...pace me maybe?
If it weren't for C, we'd all be programming in BASI and OBOL.
If you were a fish, you’d be an Angelfish.
An SQL statement walks into a bar, approaches two tables, and asks 'may I join you?'
I'm looking for a place to land my stealth bomber.
If I had a nickel for every time I saw a girl as beautiful as you, I would have 5 cents!
Do you like heavy metal? Because I can teach you how to scream.
I could get you undressed in less than 12 parsecs.
I want to floss with your pubic hair.
My foot isn't the only part of me that's lucky.
We can do coffee or do it twice, either way I'll get you a double double.
Girl you put me in an altered state of consciousness.
Girl, you're thicker than Baffin Island.
I hope you’re into cyborg-human relations, because I’m feeling like a machine right now.
You’ve got more curves than a cross country track.
Girl I've got some allostatic load for you right here.
I know you've heard about my bad motivator but I give a mean back rub!
