Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
You sure do a lot of cardio because you're always running in my mind.
You must be opening night, because my heart races when I'm close to you.
I want you to sit on my face. Seriously, if there's a chance I might lose oxygen flow and die... I'll take it.
A trumpet isn't the only thing I can make scream high notes.
Oops, I jumped into the pool with my watch on. I don't know if it is waterproof or not. I guess only time will tell.
Do you like basketball? Why I want to show my Magic Johnson.
Are you Hamilton tickets? Because I'd do literally anything to make you mine.
Have I seen you on j-date?
Girl you're so hot that I would still talk to you even after I'm off the anti-depressant pills I stole from my hospital's pharmacy.
To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide but you can't run.
Are you looking for buried treasure? Explore my chest... With a knife.
Are you an electrician? Because you turn me on.
Hey girl, you wanna strum my sitar?
I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the Toronto zoo.
I'm really good at hand-jams.
You are like a 250 W halogen, you brighten my world.
Are you the cast list? Because I can't stop looking at you.
Are you method acting because you're really in my head.
Whats the difference between an Irish wedding, and an Irish funeral? -- There's one less drunk.
People don't like having to bend over to get their drinks. We really need to raise the bar.
