Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
The worker at Cape Canaveral wanted to make a sandwich, so he went to the deli to buy some launchin' meat.
Why are horses always so fit? Because they're on a stable diet.
Roses are red,violets are blue. We're breaking up beacause I never loved you.
Why do women make better soldiers? Because they can bleed for a week and not die.
Roses are red, violets are blue, lava is hot and so are you.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? --
A fsh
The only thing wrong with doing nothing is that you never know when you're finished.
Why are pirates so mean? They just arrrr!
Are you the Easter bunny? 'Cause you've been hoppin' around my mind all day.
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!
Did you hear what happened to the blonde hockey team? They drowned in spring training.
You're like an exposed electrical wire. Hot and dangerous.
We never knew he was a drunk until he showed up to work sober.
Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other : "Funny, I smell carrots too".
Is your name Lionel? Because you made my pants Messi.
Q. What's a man's idea of a balanced diet?
A. Beer in each hand!
Q: How can you tell when a FAX had been sent from a blonde?
A: There is a stamp on it.
Nothing makes me more productive than the last minute.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? -- Because he felt crummy!
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'
