Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
Here's the key to my house, my car... and my heart
Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back
I love a good South of the border crossing.
Any simple problem can be made insoluble if enough meetings are held to discuss it.
If I flip this coin, what are my chances of getting either head or tail?
I hope you like BBQs because you'll soon be eating my sausage with special sause.
The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.
Your ugliness is so profound, it could make a horror movie director run out of ideas.
Your face is so ugly, it could make a blind man gag on his own vomit.
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
Call the cops... See who comes first.
If ugliness was a profession, you'd be the CEO.
I made a blood painting for you.
Your face is a visual assault, a crime against humanity that should be punishable by law.
I've got a knife and a penis and one of them is going inside you.
Are you a slippery pool deck? Because I'm falling for you.
Are you an astronaut? Because I really wanna explore Uranus.
You dropped something! [What?] Your smile.
How'd you like to go on a long romantic warm down and split the lane?
I can go 90 minutes without stopping.
