Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
On Yom Kippur, the Mishnah prohibits marital relations. Thank God we're not married!
I'm retired, so you know I have the time to please you.
Do you like tacos? Well cool you like 75% of me.
What's your favorite Baudelaire poem?
Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I'm gonna need one after gouging my eyes out from looking at you.
What songs does Dracula hate? - "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders.
Why do Mummies like Christmas so much? Because of all the wrapping!
What's the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.
My shrink assures me that my obsession with the formalization of puns is just a 'phrase I'm going through'.
Are you Garreth Bale? Because you make me go bananas.
In medieval times my beer belly would be a sign of prosperity and attractiveness, what do you think?
Being around you makes me higher than attending Rob Pruitt's ‘Cocaine Buffet.'
My friend told me to come and meet you, he said that you are a really nice person. I think you know him. Jesus, yeah, that's his name.
Can I light your manorah?
Is that your catheter line...or are you just pleased to see me?
I've crossed all the dog parks in the world to find you.
Is your dad a scientist? Because you're a failed experiment.
What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done? - Ok, that's a wrap.
What's the best thing to put into Christmas dinner? Your teeth!
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are built upside down!
