Keep the jokes short and funny. No one wants to read a long joke just to find out it's not that funny. One Liners is the answer. Who has time for long jokes anyway? Life's too short, take in as many as you can. Why waste your memory on long boring jokes? Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice. If you want a funny story, you won't find it here, short and funny jokes for a quick funny fix.
I’ve been looking for the perfect chef to cook up a lifetime of happiness with, and I think I’ve found you.
Do you ever buy any Christmas Seals? No, I wouldn't know how to feed them.
When phone ringing Dad says 'If it's for me don't answer it.
My friend was fired from his job at the road department for stealing. I have to say I saw it coming. The last time I was at his house all the signs were there.
When the Grim Reaper sweeps through, we have a brush with death.
Is your name Arjen? Because you're Robben my heart.
This must be decaf, cause you're just dreamy!
Sure I could buy you a drink, but I’d be jealous of the glass.
Hey baby, meeting you has given me a new leash on life.
Are you a dictionary? Because you're full of useless words and nobody cares.
Are you a Michelin star chef? Because you’re definitely making my heart rate go up.
People are choosing cremation over traditional burial. It shows that they are thinking out of the box.
It's a lengthy article on Japanese Sword Fighters but I can Samurais it for you.
If I drink a lot of Geritol am I consuming a fossil fuel?
Are you Arsenal? Cause you make me anna shoot my gun.
Hey! You owe me a drink. I dropped mine when you walked by.
Do fries come with that juxtaposition of light and color
If I raise my staff will it only part the sea?
Baby is your name Cholesterol, because you send my blood pressure skyrocketing!
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again and remind you how repulsive you are?
