Insults - Part 179

Insults. Something about sticks and stones and words that never hurt? Well, whoever said that obviously missed all of the good insults. We try and keep it clean around here, but you will find just about everything on this list for your name calling needs.

The Best Insults

If you were a tear in my eye, I would not cry for fear of losing you.

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Oh I didn't mean to pull you in so close. I thought I heard a rutting bull moose.

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Hey girl, is that an original Yo La Tengo 7” in your pants? Because your butt is extremely valuable.

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Is your name Gillian? Because I feel like I’ve finally caught the one.

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Hope your Turkey is moist and your stuffing in fluffy and when you're done eating you'll be nice and stuffy.

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Batman bought a fedora. He wanted to be the capped crusader.

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If you were a reliever, I'd sign you up to a three year contract with a vesting option.

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Let me tie your running shoes, because I don't want you falling for anyone else.

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Did you get those yoga pants on sale? They're 100% off at my place.

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I was reading in the book the Numbers, and then I realized that I don't have yours.

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If I asked you out, would your answer be the same as your answer to this question?

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There's this movie I wanted to see and my mom said I couldn't go by myself.

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Hey your hands would be a lot warmer if they were down the front of my pants?

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My beard is the same length as Abraham Lincoln's was on his 7th birthday.

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Are you a touchdown celebration? Because you’re worth celebrating.

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Can I follow you home? Because I've just caught the biggest catch of my life.

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My aunt is bringing her homemade cranberry sauce to our Thanksgiving dinner, and my uncle is bringing his blatant racism!

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I got my job at the dentist's office by word of mouth.

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Girl is your name baseball, cause I just want to hit it.

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Hey baby, your pace or mine?

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